Ask Blog Girl!
January 31, 2013
Got burning advice questions about boys, friends, school and more? Blog Girl is here for you! Every week, we take questions from YOU, our lovely readers, and choose questions at random to answer right here. If you need advice about anything, please leave your questions in the comments below. Let’s get to this week’s questions!
pixiedust wrote, “Dear blog girl, There is a girl at school who is bigger than every one, and I am the smallest out of my grade and the 3rd shortest out of the grade younger! She picks on me every day! She calls me stupid, Idiot, and really mean swear words! She also does physical stuff like pushing me, and and kicking me a little hard and then acting like she didn’t do it. I’ve told the principal but nothing gets fixed. And I’m not the kind of person to kick her back. All I do sometimes is just make a face or defend my self, It dose not work! HELP!!”
Hi pixiedust! I’m so sorry to hear that this girl is picking on you. Nobody deserves to be bullied for no reason. It seems like you have already been doing some of the things I would’ve advised you to do – such as ignoring her or telling a responsible adult. But since those didn’t work, another idea you can try is playing it cool. There’s a good chance that this girl is only picking on you to try to get a reaction out of you. So if you don’t give her the reaction she wants, hopefully she’ll get bored and move on with her life. For example, next time she calls you a mean word, just laugh and say, “That’s really funny!” and then go talk to other friends. If she kicks you and pretends she didn’t do it, joke back, “Was that you? Good one!” However, if the physical interaction crosses the line to extreme or painful, it may be time for you to consult another adult besides your principal about this matter – such as a favorite teacher or parent.
Emily wrote, “Dear Blog Girl, There is this guy I really like and my friend told him that I liked him (I wanted her to do this by the way), and he never talked to me again. What should I do?”
Hey Emily! Yes, boys are totally weird and are known to do this all the time, so don’t worry – you’re not alone! Most likely, the guy just got a little freaked out from the sudden news and is shying away because he doesn’t know how else to respond. To avoid scaring him off even more, try giving him some time to come around. Keep things normal and keep talking to him; he shouldn’t be afraid to just become a good friend! After a while, he’ll hopefully come to see that there’s nothing scary at all about you (and girls in general, heh). Having casual conversations can progress into hanging out, which can hopefully progress into a real relationship in the end!
fluffybunny135 wrote, “dear blog girl, my friends always go to the movies or the mall. they always invite me but my parents never let me go. i feel like im that nerdy kid in the group that never has any freedom i always ask my parents about it but its just the same old answer: “no”. i tried talking to them but they never listen. alot of the times my best friend is the one to invite me. now, hes a guy and my dad always gets mad if i want to hang out with him and a few friends. its not like its just the two of us together on a date, there’s always other people there. but my dad always thinks we’re going out. my parents are really strict and never let me go out and have fun. WHAT SHOULD I DO?!?!?!?!”
Hey fluffybunny135! I’m glad to hear that you’ve tried talking to your parents already, even though it hasn’t worked (yet). Calm discussions, instead of crying fits or yelling, will be the best way to get your parents to see your side. The reason your parents feel unsafe about you going out with friends is probably that they’re concerned about knowing all the details. So next time you ask them if you can go out, lay out all the information for them. Let them know which of your friends you’ll be with, where you’re going, what you guys will be doing, and what time you’ll be back. This will show your parents that you know what’s important to them and that you can be responsible when thinking about safety. Also, if you’re always thinking about going out and not concentrating on academics, that could be a potential worry for them too. Next time you ask to go out, also let them know you’ve finished all your chores and schoolwork (make sure it’s the truth too!) and that you would enjoy a little break hanging out with your friends. After all: work hard, play hard! Your parents can’t argue with that!
hungergames_99 wrote, “Dear Blog Girl, At the beginning of the school year I had this bff. She started hanging out with “the popular crowd” and talking about me. We had a few fights and she told her mom I was cussing at school when I wasn’t. I was absent for a few days and she told my new friend that she was happy that I was gone and she didn’t feel bad that I was sick. She was talking bad about me too. What should I do??????!! HELP!!!!!!!!???”
Hey hungergames_99! I’m so sorry to hear about your friend doing such hurtful things. And unfortunately, spreading lies about you and talking behind your back doesn’t sound like something a true friend does. You can try approaching her and asking nicely, “Just out of curiosity, I heard you say this about me one day. Is it true? If so, why did you say that?” If she apologizes or explains why she’s been so mean lately, great! Hopefully you guys can talk it through. If she doesn’t apologize or seems like she doesn’t care at all – it might be time to cut her out of your life. If you’re concerned about the lies she told her mom, maybe you could ask your mom to give hers a call, just to clear the air and let her know that you weren’t cursing at school. And then after you tie up all loose ends: move on! Start talking to some new people who you get along with and are actually nice and caring. There could be lots of potential friends around whom you’ve never noticed! And maybe someday down the line, your “friend” will see how happy you are and regret letting such a cool BFF like you go.
Hanna wrote, “Hey blog girl, HELP!!! Fashion disaster! I can never fit in because of my clothes. They aren’t really fashionable like everyone else’s!! I really like fashion but my mom gets me clothes that are good for a six-year-old! How can I convince her to get some nicer clothes?”
Hi Hanna! I’m sure your mom isn’t purposely trying to pick clothes for you that you don’t like! Sometimes moms have a very different fashion sense from their daughters. And if you gently let her know – I’m sure she’d be more than happy to hear what kind of clothes you like! Next time you go shopping with her, ask if you can pick out some things. Show her your choices and tell her why you like each item. Show her advertisements or magazine cutouts of your favorite outfits. After some time, your mom will most likely start to catch on. And the best part is – she’ll probably know where to get the best deals!
Tags: Ask Blog Girl